Couples Therapy Before Marriage: The Smart Start Your Relationship Deserves
Getting married is exciting: cake tastings, engagement photos, venue tours. But if you’re honest, it’s also… a little overwhelming. You’re not just planning a wedding, you’re planning a whole life together. That’s where couples therapy before marriage comes in.
Think of it as your relationship’s warm-up before the big game. It’s time to slow down, talk through the things that matter most, and set your marriage up for success. Premarital counseling isn’t about “fixing” you; it’s about making sure you and your partner have the tools, communication skills, and confidence to face whatever married life throws at you.
In this guide, you’ll find:
What premarital counseling is and how it works
Formats that fit your life: from weekly counseling sessions to a weekend marriage prep
Why this form of couples therapy is one of the smartest investments you can make
The most important topics to cover before your wedding
If you want a strong and healthy marriage from day one, this is a great place to start.
What Is Couples Counseling Before Marriage?
Couples counseling before marriage (also called premarital counseling or pre-marriage counseling) is a form of counseling designed to help couples strengthen their connection, align expectations, and prepare for the realities of married life together.
Historically, premarital counseling was primarily driven by religious institutions, especially churches, which saw it as their role to prepare couples for a successful marriage under their faith. Today, premarital counseling is widely recognized as a practical, relationship-strengthening tool offered by therapists, counselors, and coaches from diverse backgrounds.
Rather than focusing solely on spiritual preparation, modern approaches address communication skills, conflict resolution, financial planning, intimacy, and shared goals, helping couples lay a strong foundation for marriage in a way that reflects their unique values and life circumstances.
It’s different from a class or a “fill-in-the-blank” workbook. A licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT) or trained premarital counselor tailors every session to your unique story, relationship dynamics, and goals.
While many couples seek it prior to getting married to work through potential challenges, others simply want to invest in their relationship skills before the wedding. And it works: research published in Family Relations found that couples who did premarital counseling reported a 30% higher marital satisfaction rate and were less likely to divorce than those who skipped it.
Is it normal to go to couples therapy before marriage?
Absolutely. Premarital couples choose therapy all the time, and it’s one of the smartest ways to prepare for married life. Premarital counseling may help you strengthen your bond, build skills, and address any issues in your relationship before they grow.
How Premarital Counseling Differs from a Class or Workbook
Premarital counseling isn’t just sitting in a room with a generic checklist of “things to know before you get married” or filling out pages in a workbook on your own. Those can be helpful as part of your premarital education, but they’re not the same as working directly with a couples therapist who’s focused on your unique relationship.
A class or workbook might give you information, but premarital counseling can help you take that information and actually use it in real life together. It’s interactive, personal, and tailored to your story.
Here’s what makes it different:
It’s personalized to your history, values, and goals: No two relationships are the same. Your counselor gets to know your personalities, your shared dreams, and the things that sometimes trip you up, so the sessions are designed for you, not a generic couple from a textbook.
It’s a safe space to process sensitive topics without judgment: Money, intimacy, faith, family traditions, these aren’t always easy to talk about, especially if you and your partner see them differently. In counseling, you can explore these conversations in a supportive space, guided by someone who knows how to keep it constructive.
It’s real-time coaching, not just information: A workbook can’t pause you mid-argument and help you try a new communication strategy on the spot. In premarital counseling sessions, your therapist can do exactly that, showing you how to shift a conversation in real time so it’s more productive.
It gives you tools you can practice and take home: This isn’t about theory alone. You’ll walk away with concrete skills, ways to repair after conflict, set boundaries, and make decisions together - that you can use immediately and keep using throughout your marriage.
A class or workbook might help you learn about the benefits of healthy communication or teamwork, but this form of therapy takes it further. It gives you the chance to try things out with professional guidance and to leave feeling confident that you’re not just “marriage ready” on paper, you’re ready in real life.
That’s the difference between reading about a healthy relationship and actually building one, right here, before you walk down the aisle.
How Relationship Counseling Before Marriage Works
Here’s the inside scoop: premarital counseling isn’t about pointing out everything that could go wrong. It’s about building on what’s already good between you and making sure you’ve got the skills and clarity for the parts of married life that can get tricky. We’ve seen many couples walk in feeling “pretty good” about their relationship and walk out feeling even stronger, more connected, and more confident about the future.
Premarital counseling is a form of focused relationship work that we tailor to your needs. Here’s how it usually unfolds:
Formats that Fit Your Life
We know one size never fits all, so we offer options:
Weekly sessions for steady progress, if you like time to reflect between conversations
Short series over 4 to 8 weeks if you want to focus on a few clear goals before the big day
Weekend intensive if you’re ready for a faster reset and want to dig deep in just a couple of days
Before We Begin
You’ll start with a brief consult so your marriage counselor understands your story, your goals, and your vision for life together as a married couple. We might suggest an optional assessment like the Prepare/Enrich questionnaire to highlight your strengths and growth areas.
During Your Sessions
This is where therapy helps you turn insight into action. Depending on your needs, we might:
Coach you through communication and conflict repair so disagreements don’t spiral
Map out your shared values and long-term vision for your married life together
Create plans around money, roles, intimacy, family dynamics, and boundaries so there are fewer surprises later
After Counseling
You’ll leave with:
A simple, clear action plan to strengthen your relationship every day
Optional check-ins around milestones or stress points so you can adjust as life changes
Premarital counseling equips you for more than just a wedding. It prepares you for the real, everyday partnership that follows. Whether you’re in a few premarital counseling sessions, a premarital counseling workshop, or a private premarital counseling weekend, the goal of couples therapy here is simple: to give you the tools to build and keep a healthy relationship.
When couples participate in this kind of form of therapy, they don’t just prepare for marriage; they prepare for a lifetime.
Should unmarried couples go to couples therapy?
Yes. Couples therapy isn’t just for married people. Couples therapy helps partners at any stage. Whether you’re dating, engaged, or living together, attending couples therapy can give you tools for communication, conflict repair, and navigating important aspects of your relationship.
Topics Premarital Counseling Covers
When you sit down for premarital counseling, you’re not getting a generic list of things “every couple should know.” You’re getting real conversations, guided by a couples therapist, about the topics that will actually shape your married life together. These sessions are about making sure you and your partner understand each other deeply and have a plan for the areas where your needs, hopes, or habits might differ.
One of the big benefits of premarital counseling is that it allows you to discuss these important topics before they become issues in your relationship. Many couples tell us, “We didn’t even know we needed to talk about that until our counselor brought it up.” That’s the beauty of this approach to couples therapy: you get to explore the big picture and the small details that make a relationship thrive.
Here are some of the most common areas premarital counseling can cover:
Communication and conflict repair – Learning how to talk so you feel heard, and how to disagree without hurting your connection.
Money – Budgets, debt, spending, saving, and your emotional relationship with finances.
Sex and intimacy – Expectations, boundaries, and keeping your connection alive over time.
Family, faith, and culture – How traditions, in-laws, and beliefs will shape your marriage.
Parenting plans – If, when, and how you want children, and what parenting style you envision.
Daily life together – Household roles, routines, and rituals that make everyday life smoother.
Future goals – Shared dreams and practical steps to get there.
Premarital counseling helps you tackle these conversations while things are calm, instead of waiting until you’re in the middle of a disagreement. Couples who participate in this kind of form of premarital counseling often say they feel more prepared, more connected, and more confident about life together as a married couple. You’ll leave not just with answers to the big questions to ask before marriage, but with the skills to keep having those conversations for years to come.
Is Premarital Therapy Right for You?
If you’re an engaged couple or seriously talking about the future, the short answer is yes, premarital counseling is almost always worth it. It’s not a test you have to pass before the wedding, and it’s definitely not just for couples in trouble. Think of it as a relationship tune-up before you hit the road for the long haul.
This type of therapy gives you the space to talk about the things that matter most for a healthy relationship, not just who’s in charge of the playlist at the wedding, but the deeper stuff that shapes your life together. We’ve seen over and over that premarital counseling helps couples feel more connected, more prepared, and more confident heading into marriage.
It can be especially valuable if you:
Want to start a marriage with a strong, steady foundation
Keep circling back to the same disagreement without finding a resolution
Have different ideas about money, kids, faith, or household roles
Are blending families, cultures, or traditions
Want to strengthen emotional or physical intimacy before getting married
Premarital counseling offers a safe, private space to explore these topics with a couples therapist who knows how to guide the conversation. You’ll learn tools to navigate challenges now, so they don’t become roadblocks later.
When couples participate in premarital therapy, they’re not just preparing for a wedding day. They’re preparing for a lifetime together. And slowing down to focus on each other now can actually speed up your growth as a couple, so you step into marriage with clarity, confidence, and a shared vision for the future.
Bottom line? If you’re wondering whether it’s time for couples therapy, the fact that you’re asking probably means the answer is yes. Therapy can help you start strong and stay strong
Is it normal to go to couples therapy early in a relationship?
It’s more common than you think. Many couples decide to go to therapy early on to set healthy patterns and avoid future problems. It’s simply a type of therapy that helps you start your relationship on the right foot, no matter how new it is.
Let’s Get Your Marriage Off to the Best Start
At Ritenour Counseling, we’re all about helping you and your partner feel closer, stronger, and ready for whatever life brings. Whether you’re planning your wedding or already living the married life, we’ll help you build the kind of connection that doesn’t just survive, it thrives. And yes, we’ll make it feel natural, comfortable, and maybe even a little fun along the way.
Here’s what we offer:
Couples counseling before marriage in formats that fit your life
Expertise in Emotionally Focused Therapy for deeper connection
A warm, judgment-free space where nothing’s off-limits
If you’re ready to strengthen your relationship before saying “I do,” let’s do it together. Reach out!